You Must Be
Mentally Prepared
[article spans 2 pages]
by The Dating Wizard
I've never been into mumbo-jumbo when it comes to showing guys the
reality of what is involved in learning to attract the most
incredible women. There are no magic words or secret tricks. It
takes skill, and it takes knowledge, and it takes practice. The
fact of the matter is that if being successful with hot women was
easy, every guy would be doing it.
At a fundamental level, the criterion that determines your
attraction power is the degree to which your mind has been
conditioned, the degree to which you have pushed your mind in this
arena. This is the most difficult part of becoming more successful
at attraction. It involves GREAT MENTAL EFFORT as well as a
disciplined lifestyle so that you can call up your resourceful
state of mind at any time.
What do I mean by effort? Well, for example, if you are
uncomfortable even saying "hi" to a woman, then saying "hi" will
be a HUGE INTERNAL STEP of progress for you, and an important step
in your journey to success.
For someone else, he may be uncomfortable carrying on a
conversation beyond 2 minutes. For him, THAT will be his "sticking
point". For another guy, it may be getting things "physical". It
doesn't matter, for each person, he has his "sticking point" that
he must pass.
This is no different than lifting weights, which is an excellent
analogy: The only way to get stronger, the only way to pass your
"sticking points" (unless you use drugs like steroids, which
causes a whole other series of problems) is by conditioning your
mind to withstand progressively greater physical and psychic
stress, just a bit more each time. Even if it’s just half a pound.
That little tiny bit involves A HUGE effort, because it is a step
BEYOND what your body and your brain has been conditioned to do.
Every little bit is SURPASSING PREVIOUS STRESS THRESHOLDS, placing
NEW STRESS on your body. Remember, your body naturally doesn't
feel the NEED to change, to adapt, unless the need is HUGE. So you
have to push yourself HARD for every gain, for your body to
respond.
It's not your muscles that are feeling anything, it's your MIND.
Of course, you have to be realistic, you have to be 100 percent
honest with yourself- if you throw on a lot more weight than you
can possibly handle, you will not even be able to move the weight
and the exercise will be virtually pointless. However, if you even
add a little bit more weight than you were able to handle the last
time, it will be HELLISH work, but you will be able to do it, and
even if you don't complete the lift fully, your body will respond
if it was a maximum effort in good form.
This is the same with approaching women and interacting with
women. Even if you "fail", i.e. you don't get the email or number
or date or "lay", the fact of the matter is that you are
internally progressing, even if you don't notice it at first. It’s
a gradual improvement, and the problem is that many guys give up
as soon as they don't see immediate results. But that is
ridiculous, because progress is happening, it's just SUBTLE.
Just like not every workout do you go up in weight, but if you
keep at it, you eventually break through your sticking point.
Those workouts where you did NOT lift more weight, but you pushed
yourself to your proper limits, were JUST as critical and useful
as the workouts where you DID increase your resistance. In fact,
they were the KEY to the workouts where you improved. There was a
tiny bit of progress, just not enough to monitor in terms of
weight.
There's another important analogy:
When working out, it's important to not be afraid of getting
"stuck" or "pinned" under the weight, or you will psyche yourself
out. This is why many people use "spotters"- either a safety rack
in place or having another dude who will watch you in case you get
stuck so you can just focus on pushing. In fact, it's important to
push to the point of FAILURE or you WON’T get anywhere.
i.e. If you don't push to the point of FAILURE, you don't
PROGRESS.
I repeat:
You need to go the point that you FAIL in order to PROGRESS.
It's the exact same thing with learning to hone your skills at
attraction. SCREWING UP is not bad, it's actually the only way to
GROW. If you never screw up, if you don't push beyond your COMFORT
ZONE, chances are that your skills will never improve and that you
are stagnating in your comfort zone. So if a guy is comfortable
talking to women, but uncomfortable moving them to a different
area of the club, or with asking them to coffee, he is only going
to improve by pushing beyond his comfort zone, and if he "screws
up' or "FAILS" that first or second or 30th time, he is actually
PROGRESSING, as long as it was a focused effort each time and not
just a half-assed thing.
Also, being dishonest with yourself and taking on TOO MUCH at once
i.e. a guy who has never approached a woman who wants to be able
to be THE MASTER overnight - will simply not be able to benefit
from that challenge, since he has no internal frame of reference
of concept of what is actually involved. It’s like a guy who walks
in the gym for the first time and tries to lift the heaviest
weights in the room. Pointless.
You Must Be
Mentally Prepared [continued
on page 2]
If you haven't yet downloaded my eBook,
The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, then do that
immediately. This book lays the roadmap that you need for taking
things all the way from how to meet women to getting physical and
relationships. This book is where it all begins, your foundation
to your incredible future with women.
Download it now and find out more information about me, The
Dating Wizard,
here.
